December 2008
51 posts
Last night I went to see a Wake game with some friends. Emily drove me to the game and on the way there I told her about my plan to get a tattoo. I’ve wanted a tattoo for a long time. Specifically, I want a small cross on the inside of my left wrist. Truthfully, I know I’ll never get it. Not because of the reasons I’ve heard from everyone else: you’ll look trashy, you’ll get tired of it,...
Me: I accidentally made two completely different sets of plans for tonight. I'm supposed to be watching a basketball game in Winston-Salem while simultaneously hanging out and going shopping Charlotte.
Everett: I don't think we're far enough along in the cloning process to help you on this one. Maybe with a little more stem cell research... guess that's one more thing you can thank George Bush for.
Me: Yeah, I totally blame the president for this one.
Everett: You should. Your clones could have had you covered if it weren't for him.
I have a hard time determining how to end emails, letters, and notes. There are so many options, but I usually stick to one of the following four: “Love,” “Much Love,” “Best,” and some form of “x”s with the occasional “o” mixed in. But seriously, every single time I pause to think about it. Now, obviously most of my professional emails tend to stick to “Best” and if I’m feeling a little more...
I’ve been meaning to get a new phone for months. Verizon’s stupid two-year contract thing was up and it has been time for my to trade in and “upgrade,” as they say, for awhile. However, I haven’t had the chance to go until today.
Truth be told, I probably had the chance before now, but avoided it because Verizon stores might be my least favorite places on earth. ...
Lunch
This morning I read an opinion article written by Karl Rove in the Wall Street Journal about a competition he and President Bush have had for the last several years to out read each other in books. Rove has won every year, but both he and Bush have read a heck of a lot of books. While I do respect anyone who does that much reading, I was actually bothered by the article because in my opinion, if you're the president of the United States, then maybe you should put off the fun reading (ie Michael Crighton) for a few (8) years and stick to reading strictly reports, summaries, newspapers, magazines and every other form of information on current events that you can find. I voiced this opinion to my mom who immediately disagreed with me (this could possibly be out of habit of disagreeing with me on everything political). Then I said something to Everett and my dad, who both leaned a little more my direction. So, at lunch, I brought up again.
Me to my mom: They agreed with me about Bush needing to read less beach reading as president.
My mom: No one ever said that about Clinton and he supposedly read all the time.
My Dad: Clinton was doing plenty of other things all the time too.
My Mom: Like 20 year olds.
My Dad: Was she really 20?
Everett: She might have been 20, but she was a big girl.
My Dad: She wasn't that big.
Everett: She was a porker!
My Mom: Regardless, it's not like he was reading international reports while that was going on.
Everett: You never know. People need different environments to read. Maybe he was reading reports while she was twirking it. There's some guy whose claim to fame is that he was on the phone with Clinton while she was—
My Mom: Ok, we get the point.
Everett: Yeah, the point is, until your presidency is over, you shouldn't read fun books and you shouldn't screw porkers. I think I have said enough.
My Mom: Yes, you definitely have.
The beauty of this conversation is that I just threw in the idea, sat back, and enjoyed.
There is absolutely no point in this post except that I got an iPod touch for christmas and wanted to post from it.
Now I’m a blogger posting from a small mobile device using wifi. This all feels so very 21st century of me.
I get sick a lot. See the like 400 previous entries about this problem. Yesterday, as I was sitting at my desk, wondering what the deal was with the slight headache and dull pain in my muscles I was feeling was, it occurred to me that I was getting sick again. Of course. I really wasn’t even a little bit surprised. Truth be told, I was just surprised it hadn’t happened earlier than yesterday...
Really like this song right now. →
Well, I’m back in the United States. And as always that has it’s benefits. Namely, I brushed my hair this morning for the first time since Thursday. However, I’ve decided to move to Belize.
I mentioned this to my mom and brother on the phone tonight. That convo went something like this:
Me: “Did I mention that I’m moving to Belize?”
My mom: “You say...
Beachfront Convo
Laura: Pay attention to me. Quit reading your book. Let's talk.
Me: Ok, what do you want to talk about?
Laura: I don't know.
Long pause.
Laura: If you were a dog, what kind of dog do you think you would be? And don't say a dachshund!
Me: Maybe a golden retriever?
Laura: No, I don't think so. Why would you think that?
Me: Because I look like one.
Laura: No you don't.
Me: I look more like a golden retriever than any other kind of dog.
Laura: Ok, what would I be?
Me: A Chihuahua.
Laura: Yeah. So what would you be if it wasn't about the way you looked, but about how you acted?
Me: Um. Maybe a black lab?
Laura: (Laughs hysterically for several moments.) No. No, you're wrong. I bet Everett would have a lot of good reasons that wasn't the case.
Me: Fine. What would I be?
Laura: A shihtzu. Definitely a shihtzu.
Well, I’m not leaving Belize. Ever.
This wasn’t all that easy of a decision, but it wasn’t all that hard either. Frankly, life is just better here. It’s warm, sunny, everyone is nice, and things just seem more simple. So, sorry Rosie, but I think you’re going to love permanent life on the farm with your grandparents and your lover Isaac.
After going to bed at 8...
We’ve made it to the islands. Finally.
Today feels like the longest day of my life thus far and it’s not even 6 p.m. yet. Partially this is due to the fact that I got about an hour of sleep last night after a late evening in San Ignacio. I find that when I am very tired, I think that just about everything is hysterically funny. So, in my mind, Laura has become the world’s...
Today we met Wilbert. Laura and I have been waiting for this moment since our first day in Belize when our driver Alexie told us that his friend Wilbert worked at the resort where we are currently staying. As it turns out, he’s just as awesome as everyone had been telling us he was.
Wilbert took us to see some Mayan ruins, then he took us across the border to a small town in Guatamala,...
I’m not feeling particularly creative right now so there’s a good chance this entry is going to struggle a lot. Actually, I’m feeling quite lazy. Downright sloth-ish.
After much too little sleep last night Laura and I departed at 8 this morning to the “ATM” caves. There is a Spanish name and ATM are the initials, but I can’t even begin to spell out the...
Tonight, we’d been sitting at dinner for about an hour with several of the people from the resort when one of the guys suddenly leans across the table and says to me, “Did you go to Auburn?”
I obviously shook my head no that I did not. “Why do you ask that?”
“Well, I googled you before I came and saw that some girls named Crosland went to Auburn,” he...
So. Today has been easily one of the strangest of my life. It’s 3:47 here in Belize and I really can’t even describe the last six hours. There are no words. As we sat having chocolate martinis with a man I can only describe as one of the most unusual people I’ve ever met several minutes ago, Laura turned to me and said “No one will ever believe this. The only thing I...
So you know how sometimes you want to just enjoy a nice little drink after dinner on a Monday night at the bar at a resort in the middle of the Central American jungle? But then, while you’re having said drink, in walks the British ex-pat owner of the resort and his son, a sailor home from his job in the States for Christmas. And, after you’ve talked to them for a while, and teased the three...
The sun is slowly setting in Belize. The sky is turning pink while colorful wild birds chirp from leafy palm trees overhead. I smell sweet peppers roasting in the kitchen from the porch of our thatch-roof hut. And I hear the faint sound of the reggae music some of the workers play as they rake the grass. I also hear Laura moaning from her hammock about how it feels as if someone just punched...
“So today I was telling my masseuse about protons and neutrons and electrons and about how electricity works. And then she started talking about God and I told her that I don’t believe in a human God. I told her that I believe in an electricity God. One that is in our heads and in our bodies by pulses of electricity. And it’s all about electricity. He’s not some kind of human. He’s the...
13 hours of sleep later Laura and I are feeling much better. I don’t know exactly how we got so tired, but as I curled up in bed last night, desperate to close my eyes, I asked Laura what time it was. She responded that it was 8:15. I’m pretty sure that I’ve never gone to sleep at 8:15 in my life, but let me tell you, I may start doing it all the time. I feel amazing this...
Last night I was talking to Everett and he mentioned that he thought he’d slept on his finger wrong. (More on how ridiculous that is in a later entry.) After he’d finished describing his finger aches, I mentioned that I was nervous I was developing carpal tunnel syndrome from too much time on the computer. My left wrist and arm have been hurting a lot lately, especially when...
Top 10 Magazine Covers of '08 →
Fun to look at. And check out all the other top 10s too. I like lists.
I like trashy television shows. Actually liking TV is a relatively new thing for me. Before about three years ago the only television I EVER watched was Friends. Which I watched watch pretty much incessantly. (Like, I challenge you to mention a single scene from the last five seasons and for me not to remember EVERY SINGLE LINE from the entire scene. Oh the worthless information in my brain. ...
WatchRosie’s responds to Everett’s comments from yesterday’s entry.
For various reasons I’m taking some antibiotics right now that have really screwed up my appetite. Like, it’s totally off. By this I mean that I am not hungry. Not at meal times, not late at night, not even right now smack in the middle of the day, when usually the only things keeping me from taking a bite out of my dachshund are incredible amounts of self control and the knowledge that she...
While you can’t leave it behind, you can look at the events of your past from a new point of view. Turn them around. See all the angles. Consider it your second chance. Second chances do come your way. Like trains, they arrive and depart regularly. Recognizing the ones that matter is the trick.
— Jill A. Davis
So, according to my newsfeed, one of my “friends” on Facebook just went from “married” to “in a relationship.”
Now that’s a strange Relationship Status change. And the strangest thing about it is that an adult male would feel even a little bit normal about announcing that change to the world via a social medium like Facebook. It makes me think that...
You have got to be kidding me. →
People are weird.
It’s “send the magazine to the printer” week at work, which means that every ounce of creativity in me has been sucked out. Sorry. It’s all gone. It’s been put to use on things like creating headlines and fitting large amounts of words into small spaces. But alas, I do love what I do so I can’t complain too much. All of this is really just an excuse for the rambling blog entry coming up. So,...
Ouch.
So I just asked our newest intern a question. Her response? A very polite, “Yes, m’am.” I can’t say that didn’t hurt a little. Am I really that old? I mean, I appreciate it when a man who is older and I am dealing with on a professional basis calls me m’am. And I certainly appreciate it when a small child has the manners to say that. But a girl who was probably born during the Reagan...
The Truffle Shuffle. →
After this series of emails below regarding the photo of the fat dachshund in the previous post I decided that everyone should be reminded of how awesome the truffle shuffle is. You’re welcome.
Laura: That pic made me throw up a little in my mouth. For some reason a pregnant dachshund seriously grossed me out. It is pregnant, right?
Me: Um. First of all, a pregnant dachshund is a...
In one e-mail you talked about going to a manicurist, your trip around the world, and a future trip to Belize with your pill popping friend. If your dog wasn’t such a fat ass I’d think you were Paris Hilton. - Email from my brother this afternoon. He makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
“Time weighs down on you like an old, ambiguous dream. You keep on moving, trying...”
– Haruki Murakami. I liked this.
Gossip Girl Seasons Ahead →
It’s hard to say who I would want meet more. The producers of the show, so that I could profusely thank them for bringing the witty dialogue of Blair Waldorf into my life? The New York writers so I could just hang out with them because I like, totally think that we would, like, be best friends? Or Ed Westwick, so I could finally express my undying love for him as Chuck Bass?
It’s a...
Ding dong the witch is dead →
Once upon a time I worked for the biggest competition for this magazine. And, because magazines, and particular regional magazines are a cutthroat business, I wished a lot of bad things on this publication. Namely, as an editor, I wished they would quit getting exclusives on local stories that I wanted.
However, I wasn’t particularly happy to see this article today. Actually, I was...
Baby Stealing and Blood Samples →
I love LOST.
I no longer recognize marriage
I thought this was an interesting perspective:
ideasarelikestars:
armadillo:
I like this idea. I do stuff like this all the time but I hadn’t thought of this one before. I don’t know the original author :(“I no longer recognize marriage. It’s a new thing I’m trying. Turns out it’s fun.Yesterday I called a woman’s spouse her boyfriend.She says, correcting me, “He’s my husband,” “Oh,” I say, “I...
I just got a press release for fancy dog gifts for Christmas and this sentence was part of it:
The current collection features some of today’s most popular breeds, like Dachshunds (Weiner dogs), Pit Bulls, Poodles, Chihuahua’s, and Lab’s.
Now, part of me is quite pleased: dachshunds were named first among popular breeds. Granted, they were named just before Pit Bulls which pretty much negates...
I’m a little obsessive compulsive. I’ve known this for a while. When I was growing up I was the only kid I knew with a vacuum cleaner curfew: I wasn’t allowed to vacuum after 9 because it disturbed the rest of the house during bedtime hours. I wish I could say that I never broke curfew, but sometimes vacuuming just feels so good that I couldn’t help myself. I’d sneak out the vacuum and just go...
A Traditional Christmas Story. Sort of.
Twas a few weeks before Christmas and all through the hood Not a creature was stirring, not even the little dachshund who could The stocking was hung on the liquor cabinet with care In hopes that many rawhide bones soon would be there The dachshund was nestled all snug in her bed While visions of rabbit chases danced in her head And Rosie in her diaper and I in my sweats Knew that a nice winter’s...